


A light to burn all the empires

by Biket



Series: SemiShira Week 2020 [3]
Category: Haikyuu!!
Genre: Canon Compliant, M/M, Music, SemiShira Week, Sharing, Subliminal Messages
Language: English
Status: Completed
Published: 2020-10-28
Updated: 2020-10-28
Packaged: 2021-03-08 21:40:49
Rating: Not Rated
Warnings: No Archive Warnings Apply
Chapters: 1
Words: 2,241
Publisher: archiveofourown.org
Story URL: https://archiveofourown.org/works/27253585
Author URL: https://archiveofourown.org/users/Biket/pseuds/Biket
Summary: Shirabu never thought music would become such an important thing in his life. But he guessed he couldn't avoid it when Semi, his favorite singer and old teammate, made his way into his heart in his own way.
Relationships: Semi Eita/Shirabu Kenjirou
Series: SemiShira Week 2020 [3]
Series URL: https://archiveofourown.org/series/1985608
Comments: 5
Kudos: 46
Collections: Semishira Week 2020





	A light to burn all the empires

**Author's Note:**

> Lmao I'm already late with this week but anyway, day 3 - sharing!
> 
> Here's the list of the songs mentioned:  
> \- First, Semi's listening to 'The Sharpest Lives' by MCR  
> \- Shirabu makes him listen to 'Only Us' by Kygo  
> \- The song Semi sends to Shirabu is 'Honest' by The Neighbourhood  
> \- The song Semi sings in the final part is 'lonely' by MGK
> 
> Enjoy!

Shirabu thought he would be alone by now. But obviously, he had been wrong.

Anyone in their right mind would have gone home after practicing their serves for hours while still being bitter about the loss they had to live in the afternoon. But when the second year setter opened the door to the locker room to have some alone time, he spotted one of his upperclassmen, Semi, sitting on the floor, back against the wall, earphones on and eyes closed. Why was he still here?

Shirabu tried to ignore him the best he could, pretending to put his things in his bag and hoping the other boy would just leave so he could be left alone. Except Semi didn't move at all. He just stayed there, paying no attention to Shirabu and showing no sign he even knew he was here. In the silence of the locker room, all the younger setter could hear was the music pouring out of Semi's earphones. It was so loud he could almost understand the lyrics. 

After a solid five minutes spent by being stared at, Semi opened his eyes, finally seeming to sense another presence in the room. He gave a quick look to Shirabu, frowning then taking an earbud out. 

"What are you still doing here?"

"Right back at you."

"I asked first."

"Are you five or something?"

Semi sighed and it was Shirabu's turn to frown. The other boy didn't look well. It was like all the tiredness of the match they had played earlier was finally manifesting on his face, revealing how exhausted he truly was, which was kind of curious. He hadn't played for much time. Shirabu had been on the court much longer and yet, he didn't feel as exhausted. Maybe it was something else. Maybe it was because he still had another year to make it to nationals, because this match was the least of the season but not the last of his life. Shirabu didn't know if Semi had any intention of playing volleyball in college but he knew that either way, it wouldn't be the same. It would be a new team, new talents, different tournaments. 

For the first time of the year, Shirabu felt guilty. Well, it wasn't the first time, not really. He had already felt that way when the coach had announced Semi would be on the bench for the year but pride had taken the better of him that time. Now that everything was over, it was different. It _felt_ different. It felt like he had stolen something from Semi, something he could never return even if he tried. Shirabu hated this stupid feeling. He knew he deserved his place in the team, he knew he had talent and he knew he was useful to his teammates. But somehow, a voice in the back of his mind was telling him that maybe, just maybe, if Semi had played this match, things could have gone differently. 

"Stop blaming yourself." 

"Wh- What?" he asked, startled. 

"I can see the guilt all over your ugly face. It's not your fault we lost so stop it."

"Easy to say when you were on the sidelines for the most part."

"And whose fault is that?"

"I thought I was supposed to stop blaming myself?" he said, his tone as sarcastic as ever.

"Can you also stop being smart for a minute? You're interrupting my emo moment."

Shirabu frowned and looked at Semi in quite a condescending way. His emo moment? So that explained the loud music which was still coming out of the earphones. Without asking Semi if it was okay, Shirabu sat next to him and reached out to take the single earbud hanging off Semi's shoulder. 

"You won't like it," he said in a fake bored voice. 

The younger setter shrugged. He honestly didn't care. At the moment, he was just curious about what Semi was listening to. It wasn't rare to see his upperclassman with his earphones on and at the beginning of the year, the second years and Goshiki had made a bet to guess what his music taste was but they never had any confirmation. 

Shirabu didn't listen to music very often. To relax, he usually needed silence or natural background noises like birds singing, cars passing by, or simply the wind brushing leaves. And the rare times he was listening to something, it was usually something calm. He shouldn't have been surprised to discover that Semi was the exact opposite of him. He almost winced when the loud voice, the guitar, and the drums assaulted his ears. In the corner of his eyes, he saw Semi reach out for his phone and pull the volume down a bit. 

"It's... Not my taste."

"Told you. It helps me relax though," he said.

"How? It's so loud and there's like three things to listen to at the same time."

Semi laughed a little at that and Shirabu frowned. He didn't understand what was funny in what he said. 

"That's the point. Sometimes I just want to stop hearing other things or just stop thinking so I put something like that in my ears, full volume, and I can't hear anything else. And since it's a noise I can control, it doesn't bother me," he explained. 

Somehow, it made sense. It was weird, yes, but it made sense. 

"Here, put something you listen to."

Shirabu took the phone Semi was handing him and frowned in concentration while he searched for the last song he listened to. It was something out of one of the various focus playlists a lot of people made on this kind of app and he liked it enough to save it in his own space. 

As soon as the first notes and the singer's voice were heard, Semi snickered next to him. Shirabu nudged him with his elbow to keep him quiet but it only made the other laugh harder. 

"Quite the romantic, are you?"

"Shut up, it's just a song to focus when I'm working."

"Sure, sure."

"It doesn't mean anything, stop laughing you idiot."

It doesn't mean anything but Shirabu was crimson red by now, embarrassed by Semi's laughter. He could have chosen any song, he could have picked anything else but this one, and yet, a romantic song was playing right now and Shirabu was a bit too aware of his leg touching Semi's, of their closeness. Without thinking, he stood up, suddenly feeling like he was freezing. 

"I... I should go.

"What? You-"

"Goodbye."

Shirabu bowed, took his bag, and left in a hurry, his heart pounding uncontrollably in his chest. He stopped for a minute once he was outside of the gym and took a bit of time to calm down and stop panicking over... What exactly? He had no idea. There wasn't any valid reason for him to panic at the moment. They were listening to music, that's all. They weren't doing anything. Maybe _that_ was the scary part. They never had that kind of moment together. They were always sassing each other, too lost in their rivalry to think about anything else. 

But now they had a different moment. A moment in which they had been alone and yes, Semi had teased him and Shirabu had sassed back but it was different. They'd been alone in that locker room, with no appearances to keep, no barriers between them. It was scary. Scary to feel something new in his heart, something Shirabu had never known and couldn't even name. 

That night, Shirabu received a text. 

_'I'm sorry if I made you uncomfortable earlier. Here's a song I think you might like.'_

And if Shirabu fell asleep while listening to the mentioned song while being so red he could be mistaken for a tomato, well, nobody had to know. _Why this song, Semi?_

* * *

Years later and as Shirabu was walking towards the biggest concert hall of the city, the lyrics of the song Semi shared with him when they were in high school still lingered in his mind. It never really left. He had listened to it so much that by now, he knew it by heart and could sing it any time, anywhere. He would often catch himself humming it when he was studying. 

If the song never left Shirabu, Semi’s aura was worse. 

The med student never forgot his former teammates. Sure he also never forgot how it was to play volleyball with the Shiratorizawa team and he never forgot the terrible yet funny experience of living in the dorms with them but Semi… As always, anything related to Semi was different. That was probably the reason why Shirabu was currently headed to a concert when he was supposed to study and not pull an all-nighter for the wrong reasons.

But was it really wrong if it has something to do with Semi? Of course not. 

Nothing was wrong with him standing front row in a crowd when he absolutely hated feeling like he was suffocating. Nothing was wrong with him standing next to a speaker when he absolutely hated any other noise than the natural ones. Nothing was wrong with the way he was staring at Semi while the man was on stage, guitar in hand, and mic in front of his lips. Nothing was wrong with the way he closed his eyes and let himself be carried away by the flow of words Semi was singing. 

Nothing was wrong with the way his heart was fluttering. 

“ _Lonely, lonely even when the room is full._ ”

Semi’s voice was beautiful. Shirabu may be biased on the subject but to him, the man had the most beautiful voice he ever heard and he wished he could always listen to it. He wished the song never stopped. He wished he could talk to him and have him all for himself. 

“ _I’d trade it, trade it all for you._ ”

The song was sad, there was no denying it. It was about losing the people one was close to, about saying goodbye, but it didn’t have that slow rhythm made to make people cry. It was a song Shirabu could scream at the top of his lungs, a song he could listen to on repeat until he fell asleep. A song that sounded like despair with a hint of hope. Selfishly, Shirabu held onto that hope, wishing he could fit somewhere in this song. 

“ _I’m lonely, lonely without you._ ”

Maybe it was fate, maybe it was written somewhere in the law of this vast universe. But what Shirabu was sure of was that the moment when Semi finally opened his eyes and saw him wasn’t an accident. It was meant to be. Shirabu smiled, an awkward smile, one that he hoped could express all the regret he felt. He knew he’d have to apologize for not keeping in touch, for running away as he did a few years before, how he had kept running away and making excuses to avoid seeing Semi. He was scared.

He was an idiot. 

Once the concert ended, Shirabu stayed. He watched the band staying on stage for a bit, putting away the instruments and laughing together, his eyes never leaving Semi’s silhouette. After a bit, there weren't many people left and one of Semi’s bandmates was pushing him towards Shirabu. 

“Hey,” the med student awkwardly said. He didn’t know how to act. Was he supposed to do like nothing ever happened and they were still friends? Had they ever been friends? He had no idea. 

“Hey, I didn’t expect to see you there. Figured it wasn’t your style.”

Semi was smiling but there was something missing. It wasn’t bright, it was tainted with an emotion Shirabu had never seen on Semi’s face. Something like… Fear? Shirabu slightly shook his head and tried to gather some courage. He had something to say. He had lyrics still playing in his head, lyrics demanding an answer even though he didn’t know if Semi remembered ever sharing a song with him. 

“Do you still want me to be honest with you?” he asked, trying to make the shyness he suddenly felt go away.

All he could see on the singer’s face was confusion so Shirabu looked away. If he hadn’t, maybe he would have seen how Semi’s expression lit up in understanding, how bright his smile got. Maybe he would have felt braver to say what he actually wanted to say. Instead, he found himself making a reference to the song Semi was singing earlier. 

“I uh. I don’t want to say goodbye anytime soon.”

He cursed himself. He should have told him how he felt. How the song Semi offered him years ago never left his mind, how his smile was always shining bright in his head when Shirabu was feeling down. How he missed him. How he wished he could go back in time and change it all to have a second chance. To be brave when he had been a coward.

“Finally.” Semi smiled fondly and reached for his hand to make him look up. 

The singer cupped Shirabu’s face, letting his gaze wander on his lips. A second later the little space wasn’t there anymore and Semi was kissing him with all the passion Shirabu always fantasized about, a passion conveying how much they missed each other and regretted all these lost opportunities. 

A fire that would keep on burning.


End file.
